The year 2014 did a number on me. It tested my resilience above everything else. I was rejected by three law schools then I went on to fail my drivers test a whole ten times then I started my degree programme (which I still looked at the time as my consolation field of study) I didn’t do as well that year as I would have wanted to. The whole experience humbled me and anyone who knows me that I take failure very personally. Not because I think failure is beneath me, but because I make it a point to not even try at anything that I could possibly suck at. It’s a crappy mentality, no doubt, but it works.
Anyhu, I am trying this new thing where I am being as vocal about my failures as I am about the things that go well in my life. I don’t know if it will help anyone but I always feel so comforted and motivated when I hear how someone who seemingly has it all together really doesn’t. I feel less alone when I realise that I am not the only one who’s had their fair share of failures.
So, 2014. I was going to get my law degree, practice for a few years then divert to politics. (A moment of silence for that dream). Oh cherry on top, I was going to run in the 2038 presidential election.(Another moment of silence for this). It sounds so ridiculous now but 19 year old me really thought she pull that off. So when that whole carefully thought out (but not totally rational) went to sh*t at the very first stage, I took it hard.
Same year I failed driving ten times. I finally got my license though. (15th time is always a charm). Years later I went on to fail at a gazillion other things. From doing things totally wrong to being turned away from things I really wanted to be a part (Y’all sleep on me too much nccc). Point is it’s okay to fail. I am not saying go on and have a series of epic fails (although that too isn’t all that bad).
I’m saying it’s from these little and big failures that we remember how human we are and how limited we are in our humanity. We learn what a big deal it is to finally do something right. If you haven’t really failed at anything, you will never fully understand the depth of what it means to succeed at something. I think I was like that for a huge portion of my life. I took a lot of things for granted until I realised how deep failure is, how much easier it is to fail at something than to get it right the first time.
Besides, if I were to steal a page out of every life coach on the planet’s book, I would say there really is no such thing as failure, there are just learning experiences.
So be as vocal about your failures as you are about your successes. For every person that is inspired by something great that happened to you, there will always be another that will be inspired by how you went through your failures and how you picked yourself from them.