I am a very easy person to annoy. My defence is, like I have told you, there’s an old white lady trapped inside of me and she hates a lot of things. Among these are:

People who can’t keep time

Lord knows I hate waiting. More than anything in the world, I hate waiting. I would very much rather swallow a piece of my own hair than have to wait. My whole thing is keeping me waiting is a blatant disrespect and disregard of my time. I used to have a friend who used to keep me waiting every single time we were supposed to hang out. And I brought it up with them a couple of times and they didn’t seem to appreciate how serious it was.

My time means a lot to me. I have things to do. At no point in my life have I ever planned to to spend time waiting. So when somebody doesn’t appreciate my time or doesn’t realise what it means for me to give them parts of myself that I will never get back, I feel like I’m being taken for granted. So that was the end of our friendship.

Terrible Customer Service and Service Delivery

Hello TelOne! I can’t stand crappy service delivery. And I am not the kind of person to sit back and not say anything when a service I have paid for isn’t being delivered. The station manager at Telone now knows me because I believe in accountability. If something is faulty, I expect it to be fixed, if it can’t be fixed, I expect to be compensated. Then there’s the stores where you walk in and everybody just seems to be mad at you. Hayi guys. What did I do?

Loud Chewers

Have you ever had to sit next to somebody who is very aggressive with their chewing gum? Doesn’t that drive you crazy? Because it makes me LIVID. The sound of tooth meeting tooth dodging tongue diving in saliva all while caressing chewing gum is possibly the most God awful sound on the face of the planet. It can’t get worse than that.

This is the kind of chewing I can’t get with.

Unless of course if you are a loud chewer and insist on talking while you chew. Nkosi yami! I can’t stand it. A person of less restraint would throw something at people who do this.

People Who Don’t Return Books

I will have you know I was head librarian in high school. So this uncouth culture of not returning books that one borrows just makes my blood boil. I don’t think people understand the value of books. 1) Books are expensive af. 2) There’s a whole world of knowledge in them. 3) The sentimental value of the books. Normalise returning people’s book when you borrow them. And don’t keep my book for 6 months and when I ask for it back, you tell me you haven’t read it. So why did you take it in the first place?

Terrible Treatment of Other People

Look, I know I’m not the nicest person on the planet. But I will never go out of my way to make somebody else feel like crap. I hate bullies. So whether your reason for treating people like crap is because you think you are smarter than them or prettier than them or better than them in any other way, please do that nonsense away from me.

Anyhu, that’s all on this week’s list. What are your pet peeves? Let me know.